Reframe identity (separate student from behaviour)
Aim (what it achieves)
Stop students internalising ‘I’m bad / teacher hates me’ after correction.
When to use
After repeated corrections; when a student uses identity language (“you hate me”).
How to use (steps)
Teacher language (examples)
“I’m dealing with the behaviour, not you.” “I know you can get this right.”
Top tips (makes it work)
Keep it calm; say it once; then move back to the task.
Common pitfalls
Arguing about feelings; defensiveness; over-explaining.
SEND/PP considerations
Especially important for PP/SEND students with fragile self-worth or trauma histories.
Useful for these SEND needs
Relevant SEND Needs
Why this strategy helps
- Restores trust and readiness after incidents.
- Reduces cognitive load and supports completion.
- Supports regulation and relational safety.
Universal SEND-friendly: Yes
SEND-targeted: Yes
Tags
Sources
Used in
Common Behaviour Issues (Behaviour Hub)
- Repair & Rebuild Chatting during teacher talk / instruction
- Repair & Rebuild Work avoidance / blank page / 'I can't'
- Repair & Rebuild Low-level defiance / arguing / 'No' (mild)
Related strategies
Connect then correct (brief repair after correction)
Prevent resentment and ‘teacher hates me’ narratives after a boundary.
Relationship banking (planned positive micro-interactions)
Build trust so corrections land without escalation.
Restorative micro-conversation (3 questions)
Repair harm and restore learning relationships quickly.
Re-entry script (fresh start + first step)
Reintegrate students positively after conflict or sanction.
Collaborative problem solving (Plan B meeting)
Solve recurring problems by identifying triggers and lagging skills.
Adult repair (when we got it wrong)
Model respect and reduce ongoing conflict after a teacher misstep.